Female Embodied Movement (FEM)™
Your body was made to open. It was made to open and receive the body of another, to take in and create something from that experience, and to open again to release and bring forth new life.
To the degree that your body is tense or closed in response to stress, accumulated and unresolved hurt, chronic self-protection in response to trauma (remembered or not), or a habitual resistance to shaming messages from family, religion, or culture, is the degree to which you will feel unhappy and unwell.
This habit of energetic and bodily closure, which I call "The Clench," is the filter through which you experience the world. It informs your perspective about everything "out there" and broadcasts an energetic field through which the world feels, sees, and experiences you. And the world reacts, providing feedback in terms of the people and situations you attract, mirroring back to you and creating what you tend to think of as reality.
But there is something more real to who you are than your mind-made, outer-reflected story. Beyond, beneath, and within the clench is a living, breathing, vibrant, vibrating organism who is attuned to the pulsating rhythms of life, nature, and movement. I call her the Wild Woman.
By "wild" I don't mean crazy, irresponsible, or promiscuous, nor is she limited to wearing dreadlocks, growing mushrooms, and going braless. Instead, the wild woman is someone who knows and feels herself as a powerful conduit and expression for the ultimate life force, God, Truth, which is known beyond theory, beliefs, or concepts. Instead it is felt, as energy, in her heart, her gut, and in her bones. And she trusts it and surrenders to it.
It is this remembrance of the truth of ourselves which we crave. It is this embodied remembrance which restores us to our natural state of balance and wholeness. And it is where our lasting sense of joy and freedom, where our ultimate fulfillment lies - in opening to this life force energy, this truth, and allowing it to penetrate our defenses, circulate and move through our bodies, and express itself into the world as a gift, an offering.
It is how we are made.
To the degree that your body is tense or closed in response to stress, accumulated and unresolved hurt, chronic self-protection in response to trauma (remembered or not), or a habitual resistance to shaming messages from family, religion, or culture, is the degree to which you will feel unhappy and unwell.
This habit of energetic and bodily closure, which I call "The Clench," is the filter through which you experience the world. It informs your perspective about everything "out there" and broadcasts an energetic field through which the world feels, sees, and experiences you. And the world reacts, providing feedback in terms of the people and situations you attract, mirroring back to you and creating what you tend to think of as reality.
But there is something more real to who you are than your mind-made, outer-reflected story. Beyond, beneath, and within the clench is a living, breathing, vibrant, vibrating organism who is attuned to the pulsating rhythms of life, nature, and movement. I call her the Wild Woman.
By "wild" I don't mean crazy, irresponsible, or promiscuous, nor is she limited to wearing dreadlocks, growing mushrooms, and going braless. Instead, the wild woman is someone who knows and feels herself as a powerful conduit and expression for the ultimate life force, God, Truth, which is known beyond theory, beliefs, or concepts. Instead it is felt, as energy, in her heart, her gut, and in her bones. And she trusts it and surrenders to it.
It is this remembrance of the truth of ourselves which we crave. It is this embodied remembrance which restores us to our natural state of balance and wholeness. And it is where our lasting sense of joy and freedom, where our ultimate fulfillment lies - in opening to this life force energy, this truth, and allowing it to penetrate our defenses, circulate and move through our bodies, and express itself into the world as a gift, an offering.
It is how we are made.
Why Am I So Tired?
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We are tired because we have been trying to "do" love. We have been trying to give love and get love, even attempting to self-love through our efforts and action - doership - in an attempt to achieve what we sense is our birthright. We've been trying to pursue ultimate love, truth, bliss, and fulfillment like a man would - with our personal willpower and from the neck up. In doing so we've forgotten that our true source of power lies right within our very own bodies and our ability to connect to and surrender to the bigger love that we already are.
Conditions like:
might result from exhausting our mind-driven, culture-driven, limited physical resources through doership. Perhaps it is our organism's way of saying, "Enough!" Perhaps it's the wise wild woman in us who knows there is a better way. |
Art by Jennie Wakefield
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The Practice
We call this a practice because it works when you use it and it won't work if you don't. The more you "practice," the more your body will relearn and remember this more natural way of being.
It involves a commitment to "re-wilding" yourself, which means reconnecting with your body, feeling yourself in your body, telling yourself the truth about what you are feeling, allowing that truth to flow as energy in and through your body, and allowing it to be expressed and released as an offering to the world, a prayer.
And since all energy is movement and emotions are energy in motion, you will need to learn how to let emotional energy flow through your body in a way that feels safe and natural to you, in a way that frees your body, and in a way that doesn't have a negative impact on others.
There are many ways to do this. Body-informed, body-centered, and somatic therapies are based on this premise. But in my experience, a dance and movement practice not only facilitates healing and release at the level of the bodymind, it also activates life force energy, libido (which is not limited to sexual) energy.
It pays particular attention to the lower part of your body, the part we usually ignore, and invites the unclenching of the tender, vulnerable, soft-woman parts of your body, allowing them to tell their story. And you honor them by listening to how they want to move and you feel yourself unravel and unclench in the process.
Over time you will notice the clench more often and will catch it much sooner. And you will release it as you walk, wash dishes, drive to work, sit at your computer, or make love.
It involves a commitment to "re-wilding" yourself, which means reconnecting with your body, feeling yourself in your body, telling yourself the truth about what you are feeling, allowing that truth to flow as energy in and through your body, and allowing it to be expressed and released as an offering to the world, a prayer.
And since all energy is movement and emotions are energy in motion, you will need to learn how to let emotional energy flow through your body in a way that feels safe and natural to you, in a way that frees your body, and in a way that doesn't have a negative impact on others.
There are many ways to do this. Body-informed, body-centered, and somatic therapies are based on this premise. But in my experience, a dance and movement practice not only facilitates healing and release at the level of the bodymind, it also activates life force energy, libido (which is not limited to sexual) energy.
It pays particular attention to the lower part of your body, the part we usually ignore, and invites the unclenching of the tender, vulnerable, soft-woman parts of your body, allowing them to tell their story. And you honor them by listening to how they want to move and you feel yourself unravel and unclench in the process.
Over time you will notice the clench more often and will catch it much sooner. And you will release it as you walk, wash dishes, drive to work, sit at your computer, or make love.
Why Unstructured Dance and Movement Is So Important and Shelly Gets Emotional
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You Do Not Have To Know "How" To Dance . . .
because you already do. "Dance" in this case is simply allowing yourself to quiet your mind, relax your body, and allow carefully and intentionally chosen music to move your body. You are not the doer. You are not the dancer. Instead you are being danced by the part of you who knows how to heal you, knows how to free you, knows what you need.
You just have to get out of the way.
You just have to get out of the way.
You Do Not Have To Be Thin, Fit, Young, Or "In the Mood . . ."
because you dance wherever you are, whatever state of fitness or lack thereof. You listen to your body and respect its natural rhythms in any given moment. You dance your shyness. You dance your shame. You dance your awkward discomfort. You tell the truth with your dance. And it sets you free.
You Can't Do It Wrong . . .
because there is no right or wrong - only your willingness (or not) to tell the truth. Lying to yourself or pretending is not "wrong," but it will not get you where you want to go. It never has. This is your chance to bring forth anything and everything that you are ready to. And nothing you bring forth is wrong. It's simply been hidden.
Between the head and feet of any given person is a billion miles of unexplored wilderness. Gabrielle Roth
Why We Overeat and What It Has To Do With Full-Bodied Pleasure
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Why Is Returning To the Body So Important and Why Does Humanity Need It?
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The Female Embodied Movement™ practice can be weaved in to your individual counseling and coaching sessions to whatever degree feels right to you. Group workshops are also available, for beginning movers and those who are already engaged in a dance/movement practice. |
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Please contact Shelly if you would like to be added to the FEM™ mailing list specifically. And please state in your comments whether you want to receive all emails, emails for therapists, or just FEM™ events and happenings. Thank you!